Barney Raccoon

General Information
Barney "Fur" Raccoon was born and raised in Coonland, Four Islands, Jupiter. He currently resides in the Coon House and is best known for his frequent deaths, panic attacks (in which he runs, like most other native Raccoons, back and forth in a straight line), the bass player in a band (manned by the likes of Lonestar Jacques Bear, Santa's Little Helper, Bonestar Jacques Bear, and Hippy H. Hippo), as a first-string quarterback and wide receiver at Bearland University, for his professional gliding skills, as well as a brief stint at the Coonland Presidency.

Background and Early Life
Barney belongs to the Coon Family, headed by Daddy Coon. Though the parameters of who is actually in the the family remain unclear, it is assumed, quite reasonably, that not everyone in the Greater Coon Family is a biological member. As a biological son of Daddy Coon, Barney is thus treated as an upper class citizen of Coonland, as society on the island appears to be grounded on the establishments, achievements, and overall influence of the Coon Family.

The Chute Incident
As a young coon, Barney fell down one of the thousands of Coon House transportation chutes after wandering away from the nursery. As a result, his right femur was replaced with a titanium rod. While the accident has actually made his right leg noticeably stronger than his left, it has nevertheless left him with frightening flashbacks upon recalling the event. His skills in and passion for gliding appear to be related to the traumatic event.

Personality
Barney is known as a bit of an eccentric, displaying unbridled enthusiasm for most of Lonestar J. Bear's ideas. He is unusually confident in most of his endeavors despite the smallest worries, concerns, and fears sending him into one of his signature panic attacks. Of his greatest fears, however, is that of centrifuges being present near him--the reason being that they attract assorted ghosts, ghouls, and other such apparitions which appear to seek him out specifically to kill him. He expresses an immense love for various flavored Funyuns as well, his favorite being Spicy Cajun. He, like other Jupiterians, frequently dies but returns to life via an assortment of powers present within some of the planet's inhabitants.

School and Education
Though Coonland and Bearland are known for a regressive educational system, Barney's consistently poor grades seem to indicate that this system has not been very helpful. Though the same age as Bonestar J. Bear, he is frequently observed hiding the fact that he is quite a few grade levels below (or higher, depending on how you view the system) Bonestar. Whether he ever completed his education with a degree or not remains a dispute among both his critics and supporters alike. He has started for the Bearland University football program as both a quarterback and wide receiver.

Memorable Quotes
"WAAAAAAHHHHHH"

"TWAH TWAH TWAH"

"It's me! Barney the Coon!"

"Blegch"

"That was my Cat noise."